Worth it all

IMG_2423I am always tired, so tired that sometimes I want to cry. I have not had a full night sleep in 8 years. Taking a shower has become a luxury sometimes. My body has changed in ways I could not have even imagined. My life is no longer my own. Sounds like torture, right? Welcome to motherhood!

As a mom of three kids, life is as hectic as it can get. Taking care of three little lives is a 24hr job plus I also work full time as a teacher. Don’t you dare say that being a teacher is easy because teachers get to come home early and have all that time off! Unlike other jobs, I bring home piles of work everyday and guess what I do during my time off? More work! This spring break I had to mark 120 student reports. Can you tell I am a bit sour about people’s perception of my profession? Sorry, but it gets infuriating sometimes hearing what people think being a teacher is all about.

Anyway, back to being tired all the time. It is hard not to lose yourself as you immerse yourself in motherhood. Sometimes it can feel like you are drowning and no matter how hard you try to come up for air, you just keep going under. Morbid, I know, but that is the reality of it sometimes. Sure, there are plenty of happy moments that completely overshadow how exhausting parenting can be. Do not be fooled by the picture perfect images you see on social media of perfectly groomed and well behaved children with their pristine parents doing wonderful activities together. Do you know how much effort was put into taking such pictures? Do you really think they woke up like that and spontaneously took the picture that looks so perfect? Nope. Nope.

So after I described how insane my life is, would I change it? Not for anything in the world. I love being a mom. The messy hair, the spit up on my shirt and the messy house is all evidence that I care for my kids and am hands on whenever I can. I cry because I am so tired. Then my kids run up to me with hugs and kisses and tell me they love me and in that instant, it all becomes worth it. Motherhood is hard as blazes, but the rewards are immense.

Here is a picture of my kids. We were going out for a gathering and they had to get dressed up so I figured I would take the opportunity to capture the moment they actually look put together. I also had to take 30 shots before I got one where all were sort of looking at me, where they were actually sitting down and not doing yoga on the couch and where they weren’t screaming at each other. I also needed my husband to act like a fool behind me to make them smile.

But look at those faces; I love these kids with every fibre of my being. Everything I do in my life is for them and I do not regret it one iota. There will forever be my babies and hold the keys to my heart.

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